Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
