I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
I just remembered Dan asking me all polite in the middle of sex "do you mind if I get behind you?" that was the most polite way I've been asked to do it doggy style
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Randomize
