Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Randomize
