Capitaan dildo arrescate!
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize