My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
