Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Like I would feel weird too if you just cancelled our wedding, cut off all your hair and started twerking everywhere
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
