Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
Randomize