I wish I could teleport
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
i out mim tonsoeep
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