another moral hangover. fuck.
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
I'm at about main and main street
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
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