well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Randomize
