New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
