I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize