Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
Randomize
