My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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