Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
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