Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
