and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
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