singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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