david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
