I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize