I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Currently siting in the living room naked, staring at one of the girls across the street in her living room naked. This is like the most intense starting contest of all time.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
This woman at the blackjack table is sitting on a pile of newspaper so she can pee at her seat and never miss a hand.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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