I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
So am i just your go-to 'i found a tick on my penis' number?
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Randomize
