This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
whoever says they hate hangovers just doesnt know how to embrace them. i'm eating a mashed potato sandwich and watching grind.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
Randomize
