Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
He's like a unicorn and I just wanna domesticate him
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Randomize
