One girl and one boy is just not enough.
I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
They called me at 5 AM saying they had a present for me
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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