i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
