Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I just had to give myself a pep talk to stop lying on my floor. Literally too hung over to function
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
One minute we were playing beer pong, and the next minute I was sprinting to my apartment with a watermelon. wtf happened in between?
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
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