Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
