she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize