i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
