Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
I should be sponsored by Trojan
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am intoxicated and cannot bring you a burrito. However, if you want to bring ME one...
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I transported a midget tonight. He got beat up by another, midgetier midget. Is it bad that this is what makes me feel compassion after 15 years of being a paramedic?
Midgetier?
Smaller, yet meaner.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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