im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
