her vagine was all disorganized.
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
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