oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
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Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
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Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I'm pretty sure I naked in my first year of college more than I was as a baby.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
There's a difference tho. *I* drink at seven in the morning because I work graveyards. YOU drink at seven in the morning cause you're an alcoholic.
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