Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
