I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
That's when you crack a 10am beer
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
Randomize
