why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
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