I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
Dicks are not precious.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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