quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Randomize
