you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
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Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
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I have enough bourbon in me to put Justin's cat in the dishwasher.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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