What a fucking waste of an outfit
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Randomize
