Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
