we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
