Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize