I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
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