he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
