Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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