so I'm never txting u again after today...
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
This girl is more easily done than said...
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.