I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
why is half of my head shaved?
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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