I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Is it unethical to trim my bush hair with the scissors from my office?
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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