I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
I woke up and he had cut my bangs and put makeup on me.
I don't care how good they make you look, you've got to stop sleeping with gay guys.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
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